THE SADDEST MOMENT IN MY LIFE

I wrote this almost a year ago, but I had no courage to post it in my blog. I think finally I can pull myself together and publish it anyway. However, it still hurts when I realize that she's gone for good..
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My mom passed away on April 18, 2014 at 21.30 WIB, after a long illness. I was sitting next to her. Hold her hand, whispering the name of Allah on her right ear.

She died wearing dress that I gave on her birthday 3 years ago. In the last month of her life, she slept everyday in my brother's room, and that evening, she chose to die on her favorite couch that my husband gave her. The last wish she couldn't get was seeing my dad because my dad was away at that time, in Sorong, Papua. But thank God, that evening I could get her my dad's voice thru the cell phone. They were talking for a while, my mom was crying, and my dad was trying to cheer her up. He promised will come on earliest flight tomorrow morning. But few hours later after they talked, she was gone. My dad cried like a child when my brother told him the news. And so the rest of my aunts, where my dad stayed home at. Good bye mom, I saw you die peacefuly, you died husnul khotimah, insha Allah.

Tuhan Titiplah Ibuku.
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terlalu singkat rasanya waktu yang
Engkau berikan
meruak masih sejuta kata
yang belum aku sampaikan
tertulis sudah penaMu
tergores takdir berpisah
tertinggal hanya seribu maaf
tak sempat aku haturkan

doaku Tuhan, titiplah ibuku selalu di sisiMu
dan Tuhan kumohon ampunilah segala dosanya
terimalah ibuku dan jagalah dia selamanya

di alam nanti mungkinkah
Kau pertemukan lagi kami
terhimpun masih selaksa cinta
yang ingin aku ungkapkan, oh Tuhan..

Tuhan aku kirimkan sejumput doa
titiplah ibuku.

dan Tuhan kumohon ampunilah segala dosanya
terimalah ibuku dan jagalah dia selamanya

Edited from
Tuhan Titiplah Orang Tuaku, by Budi Bidun.

Goodbye Mom..